Shooting for the Stars with a Machine Gun

Here we are again. A few years older and a few years wiser. More experienced and ready to take on the world. Or maybe I am just in a very prolonged manic state. Either way, I am setting my aim higher than ever before with my current endeavor. Which is throwing together a niche magazine with my friends and family. And I am taking back to using this blog space to hone my own writing skills. From my understanding, if you don't use them, you lose them. And I don't deal well with loss. 

Which brings me to something that I found recently; the spark of motivation and creativity that was sucked out of me for years by people who took me for granted. Be that fellow writers, old bosses, or internet strangers. I wasted the most formative years of my life entertaining and inspiring people that equally wasted what I gave to them. All the time I spent creating worlds for other people, I forgot to create one for myself. Someday, I may go into length on the reasons why I can no longer write in the high fantasy genre. Or if you are curious enough to ask, I might be dumb enough to indulge you. Just know, that used to be my jam. Swords, sorcery, and maidens in dire need of rescue. These things were what I wanted to write. These things I enjoyed writing. Sometimes, though, it isn't meant to be and that wasn't meant for me. Maybe someday, like I said. But today, we move forward and onto better things. All it took was a couple good friends lighting a fire under my ass. Or was it a taser to the face? I don't remember, but I do recall everything that I forgot along the way to this point. I have more than enough experience, pain, and love to make this work. I just can't do it alone.

This is my now or never moment. Time to shit or get off the pot and all those other cliche sayings that mean nothing if you don't follow through. If I can't succeed at this, at creating something that influences people in a positive manner, then I will resign myself to the mid-level thug I have always been pegged as. Or at the very least, just another face in the crowd. 

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